Michael R. Shannon

Michael R. Shannon is a Virginia-based public relations and media consultant with MANDATE: Message, Media & Public Relations who has worked in over 75 elections on three continents and a handful of islands. Michael’s columns have appeared on his own News & Messenger site and AmericaSpeakOn. The Tampa Trib has published some of his columns, as has Black Velvet Bruce Li. He was an editorial writer and columnist for the Dallas Morning News, and has been in politics and journalism since 1972. As consultant to The Israel Project, he has made a number of trips to Israel where he worked closely with the Ministry of Foreign Affairs in their efforts to promote a positive image of Israel. Shannon has also conducted media and message training workshops for MFA and Israeli Defense Forces spokespersons along with representatives of various non–governmental organizations. During the UN Court trial in The Hague, Shannon worked closely with the MFA in its international media outreach. You can reach Michael at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it or This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it . You can also read more on his blog, "The Whole Shebang (mostly)" at http://michaelshannon.wordpress.com/. Look for Michael's Book, "A Conservative Christian's Guidebook for Living in Secular Times: (Now With Added Humor!)"


Wednesday, 19 August 2009 19:00 GFP Columnist - Michael R Shannon
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Al GoreThere are reports that mainline pastors all across America are avoiding sermons on the topic of hell. It appears there is something about burning forever in a lake of fire that modern church goers find a bit too negative on a sunny Sunday morning.

Why, it’s getting to where if you want authentic hellfire–and–damnation preaching you have to find an environmentalist. The difference being Christians refer to punishment in the future; but for environmentalists it’s always hell on earth.


Environmentalism offers everything but hope for its human practitioners. As a child I read a tract that was frightening and my current pastor regularly reminds the congregation that we fall short, but Grace is available to all if you accept the offer. 

Environmentalism, on the other hand is constant, non–stop hectoring.

 
Wednesday, 12 August 2009 19:00 GFP Columnist - Michael R Shannon
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ImageI know a guy at Gold’s Gym who has a minor sports hernia. He says the injury is like a poultry pop–up timer, the kind you see on frozen Thanksgiving turkeys.

A turkey’s timer pops out of the carcass when it’s done and announces it’s time to take the bird out of the oven. My friend says his hernia works the same way: when his intestine pops out of the abdominal wall, he’s done and it’s time to leave the gym.

There’s no real pain associated with a hernia this small, but to prevent gym members from being startled by the sight of a human jack–in–the–box expelling his innards, he’s started wrapping up in an Ace bandage. He’s found it slims and tightens without messy creams.

 
Wednesday, 15 July 2009 19:00 GFP Columnist - Michael R Shannon
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ImageGood news for Virginia auto insurance adjustors: Gov. Kaine’s decision to close 18 interstate rest areas will mean more sleepy truck and automobile drivers careening down our highways. Since the only thing keeping many of these unfortunates awake will be a painfully full bladder, the rest of us may have to choose between being run over on the highway or trampled at the door to the restroom.

Studies show that up to 60 percent of all traffic accidents are caused by dozing drivers, so there should be no shortage of crash–related business for the foreseeable future.


Why in just a very short time, our highways may exhibit the same frenzied thought processes that already characterize the sleep–deprived zombies currently stumbling the halls of the Obama White House.

 
Wednesday, 01 July 2009 19:00 GFP Columnist - Michael R Shannon
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South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford ponders a question as he admits during an interview with The Associated Press that there were more encounters with his Argentine mistress than he previously has disclosed, in his office Tuesday, June 30, 2009, in Columbia, S.C.He Should Have Stuck with Email - Vice–Admiral Horatio Lord Nelson was famous, among other things, for his contention that “no man is married South of Gibraltar.” But before South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford adopted the Nelson philosophy and began his Argentine Adventure, he should have checked to see if his wife was a nautical woman.

Here in the Commonwealth, things have been quiet on the adultery front since Gov. Robb and his beauty queen crew last set sail in a hot tub. Other than the occasional disagreement regarding last names and how many commoners can visit the mansion, matrimony has been smooth sailing in Richmond.


I’ve worked with politicians in Virginia and elsewhere and I’ve never had to handle an adultery scandal. Other than the occasional indictment (one acquittal, two guilty), it’s been mostly accusations of not raising taxes, voting to roast orphans or being a Christian.

 
Wednesday, 24 June 2009 19:00 GFP Columnist - Michael R Shannon
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This May 4, 1963 file photo shows policemen leading a group of black school children into jail, following their arrest for protesting against racial discrimination, near the city hall of Birmingham, Ala. The mayor of Birmingham, Larry Langford, is issuing a blanket pardon for thousands of people who were arrested in the Alabama city during civil rights protests in the 1960s. Langford announced the pardon during a City Council meeting Tuesday, Aug. 11, 2009.Last November, with the jeers of my wife and daughter ringing in my ears, I walked up the sidewalk to Henderson Elementary to cast my write–in vote for Sarah Palin.

I knew there was no chance for victory, but I had some small comfort in the knowledge the election of Barack Obama would prove once and for all the United States had moved past prejudice, overcome the legacy of Jim Crow and was at last a post–racial society.


There was sound precedent for this conclusion. John F. Kennedy’s election put paid to anti–catholic bias and Jimmy Carter proved being a simpleton is no barrier to the Presidency, so Obama’s victory should have allowed us to take off the racial hair shirt.

 

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